Today I also share my day with all the women of the world!
Happy Women's International Day! Today is a worldly celebration of respect, appreciation and love towards women to a celebration for women's economic, political and social achievements. Many women in this world today still don't feel or are free, so for them today I pray and am thankful I am free.
I can't even believe I am tying a 3-0. Seems like yesterday I was buying lotto tickets and cigarettes (legally for the first time) after school with my friends to celebrate my turning 18!!
Now all that plays in my mind is Ahmad's song lyrics "Back in the day when I was young I'm not a kid anymore but some days I sit and wish I was a kid again" over and over again, nostalgically.
I get nostalgic every birthday as I think about what I've been through, the friendships I made, the people I have lost either in spirit or in flesh, the things I should have or shouldn't have done, but this year this birthday is different.
My son, Nikolas has changed my way of thinking.
As I celebrate another birthday today, it becomes not just another birthday. Its now a year in which God has granted me to see my son grow. To be granted one more year to parent, one more year to learn, one more year to love oh and there's so much love I want to experience with my son and my husband.
This year marks an important decade, one that up until now I hadn't thought much about. But today as I turn 30 I enter this decade in my life refreshed, in good spirits and excited for what my life will bring me.
This decade to me signifies my stability.
-Stability in my marriage as we will celebrate our 5th and 10th years together both big markers in any relationship as far as I am concerned.
-Stability in my professional career as I have finally settled into something I like and actually went to school and got my master's degree in (shocker!) so it wasn't all in vain as the societal norm usually goes.
-Financial stability for both my husband and I. We've finally paid off silly college/going out credit card bills and now just have 'grown up bills' to pay for.
-Stability in our parenting. We will settle into what it means to be a mother and father in a committed relationship raising a son (and hopefully more sons and daughters) and focus our lives on raising good citizens who one day will go out into this world and do great wonderful things with love.
-Stability in my own skin. This is probably the most important stability of all because without feeling good and free what would I am and the skin I am in, I couldn't accomplish all of the above. Having a child boosted my self confidence about my body- no I'm not 120 pounds again like I was in high school, shhhh, I'm not even down to 150 pounds, I wish. I'm still chubby, that's not what I mean when I say this.
I mean that I became so proud of what my body did in creating such a perfect little life that I am proud of the skin I am in. I have always had curves, yes, at times my curves have been skinner and at times they've been more reminiscent of huge waves, but they are mine and without me being who I was, I wouldn't have all the amazing people I have in my life today. I work hard, I love hard and deep. I am kind and bitchy. I am easy going and neurotic. I am straightforward and passive aggressive. I am fun and I can be a party pooper. I am not perfect and I love that. It means I have work to do with improving myself, but I can honestly say I am finally comfortable with who I am.
Today marks a big day. It's a great day. For me. For all the women of the world.
Thank you all for all the wonderful birthday wishes, your kind words, your love and your encouragement! I am blessed.
Happy 30th Birthday to me!
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